Easing Back In: Sex After a Long Gap
After illness, grief or a dry spell: the first conversation, physical checks, a six-step ladder back to closeness, and when to get help.
In Under $15
By Whole Life HQ4 parts · about 4,400 words · printable · read online
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OpenFor adults 18+. Educational and non-explicit. It is not medical advice; for pain, bleeding or worries about your health, please see a doctor or sexual health clinic.
Who it's for
Couples and individuals returning to closeness after illness, grief, a baby or a long dry spell who want a gentle, pressure-free way back. For adults 18+.
What you receive
- 4 written parts, about 4,500 words
- Why gaps happen and why they feel big, with the first conversation scripted
- Physical checks before you begin, and a six-step ladder back to closeness
- What to do when things do not go smoothly, who can help, and a review page
4 printable pages, in reading order
- Part 1: Why gaps happen, and why they feel so big
- Part 2: The first conversation and the checks before you begin
- Part 3: The six-step ladder back to closeness
- Part 4: When to get help, and keeping closeness going
See inside
The first 4 pages, as they print.
Look inside
The first page, word for word. 4 printable pages in total.
Part 1: Why gaps happen, and why they feel so big
This guide is for adults 18 and over. It is educational and non-explicit. It is not medical advice and it does not replace a doctor or a sex therapist. If you have pain, a sudden change, or any worry about your health or safety, please see a professional (details are in Part 4).
A gap in your sex life can last weeks, months or years. It can follow an illness, an operation, a loss, a baby, a move, a stretch of heavy work, a rough patch in the relationship, or simply a time when nobody started anything and nobody mentioned it. Whatever the reason, the longer it lasts, the larger it can loom. A gap of three weeks feels like a pause. A gap of three years can feel like a wall.
This guide is about getting back in gently. It will not tell you how much sex you should be having, and it cannot promise how things will go. It gives you a way to understand the gap, a plan you can set at your own pace, words for the conversation, and a clear sense of when to ask a professional.
What is in each part
- Why gaps happen, and why they feel so big
- The first conversation and the checks before you begin
- The six-step ladder back to closeness
- When to get help, and keeping closeness going
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Downloads included
4 printable pages: see the list
- Part 1: Why gaps happen, and why they feel so big
- Part 2: The first conversation and the checks before you begin
- Part 3: The six-step ladder back to closeness
- Part 4: When to get help, and keeping closeness going
They open in your library, and you can print them, once they are yours.
Who wrote it
Written by the Whole Life HQ team.
Not yet reviewed by an outside expert.
We plan to ask a sex educator or therapist to review it. Until then it is general information, not professional advice.
General information and gentle suggestions, not counseling or therapy. If you are in crisis, call or text 988 (Suicide and Crisis Lifeline). In an emergency call 911.
How you get it
- In your libraryAfter you pay, it is in your library straight away.
- Any devicePhone, tablet or computer. Print it if you like paper.
- Yours to keepIt stays in your account, and you can come back any time.
